I know I said I wasn’t posting another list until I got all the work on my websites done, but I just missed you guys a lot. That and no one else sent in any more lists. So I thought I’d post one for old times’ sake.
THE TOP
#10 BIG HUNK – Let’s start with the greatest name a candy bar could aspire to. I was going to go with Milky Way, but Big Hunk is so different. It’s nougat, but it’s white? What’s up with that? If you’ve never had one, give it a try.
#9 SKOR – There was a time when Bryan Yutzie and I would have a Skor bar every single day. We called it “the daily Skor bar.” Pretty clever, no? I’m not normally a toffee guy, but maybe because Skor is so think it just hits the spot.
#8 KRACKLE – a Krackle big block used to be my dream every Easter. I loved these things. The only reason I don’t rate it higher is because you can’t eat one every day, but were they great when you did.
#7 ROLOS – You need some caramel. You need some chocolate, but you want it in a tetrahedronal shape, or whatever that dumb thing was. Rolos ruled!
#6 HERSHEY (w/ ALMONDS) – Sadly, most Canadians would disagree because for some strange reason, Hershey’s chocolate has a different flavor up here! I’m not kidding. (Also true: Mountain Dew is not allowed to have caffeine! Like anyone would drink it otherwise.) I wonder if Canadians ever feel like the world is just playing a cruel joke on them?
#5 MARS – I’m talking the cream colored wrapper, not the new dark one. How can you make Mars bars without the almonds? It’s criminal! I only wish they were bigger.
[I just realized I forgot all about Watchamacallits. I’m too far into the list to change now. Sigh.]
#4 CHARLESTON CHEW - I think I speak for everyone when I say that Charleston Chews are about the only good thing
#3 BUTTERFINGERS – one of my best memories was going to summer camp and having a package from my mother for gifts to open; one a day. Of course I usually opened them all within half an hour of arriving. Good thing too, because Butterfinger wasn’t usually until Wednesday, and would have melted by then. I love these things. If they made Butterfingers after-dinner mints…I think I could die happy.
#2 REECE’S PEANUT-BUTTER CUPS – Technically, this isn’t a candy BAR, but Reece’s are so freaking good we’ll let it slide. Has there ever been a more classic flavor combination than peanut butter and chocolate? I think not. One caveat, though: there is a wrong way to eat a Reece’s. I was talking to Scapedragon the other night, and her way is just sick!
And the number one candy bar is…..
#1 SNICKERS – There’s nothing super flashy about Snickers. It doesn’t knock you out of the park. The thing is, you never get tired of them. Like I said: I can’t eat a Krackle every day, and I don’t think I’d want to even try a Big Hunk. After a bag or two even the Reece’s would get a little old. But Snickers doesn’t ever change. It’s always a good idea. Well, almost always. I guess I have to tell the story of when I got hit in the balls with a frozen Snickers bar. It was the worst pain of all time. I was talking about this once with my brother, and my mom chimed in that childbirth was a far worse pain. I scoffed at her and asked her, “Mom. After you had me, you wanted to have more kids, right?” “Of course.” She answered. “Well mom, I NEVER want to get hit in the balls again with a frozen Snickers bar.” Case close. Good eatin’, though.
